Life at home

We have officially been home now for three days and Holden seems to be doing great. When people ask me how he is, my response is, "He seems normal!" And how thankful I am for the normal! On March 26 (the day after Holden was born), we were very uncertain of whether Holden would get to come home at all and if he did, what he would be like. But, he is waking me up at night, sleeping lots during the day, nursing well, and needing lots of diaper changes. For now he is doing everything a baby should be doing. We praise God for that. My email and phone continue to be flooded with people who are checking on us, continuing to pray for Holden and my recovery and are loving us in countless ways. Thank you. I have tried to keep lists of all the wonderful things that people have done for us, but I think I have lost track. Let me say that we owe lots of thank you notes and a gigantic debt of gratitude for the way people have loved us through these past two weeks. We will never be able to fully repay you. Thank you over and over again.

I had an appointment with my doctor last week and she asked about Holden. I started to cry as I told her that I just don't feel like we deserve all of the goodness that God has lavished on us. But that is grace right? None of us deserve all that God offers us in regards to forgiveness, His mercy, salvation, etc. Romans 2:4 comes to mind:

Or do you think lightly of the riches of His kindness and tolerance and patience, not knowing that the kindness of God leads you to repentance?

It is the kindness of the Lord that draws us close, and then once we see God for who He is, we stand in awe of Him. This whole experience with gestational diabetes, Todd's job, Holden's birth and time in the NICU has allowed me to trust God is brand new ways. I'm not perfect...and I still have moments when I grumble because I take my eyes off of Him, but I have seen and choose to believe that God is sovereign and knows what is best for me, for our family. 

Holden is such a treasure! I recognize that he is no more special than any other baby, but I can't wait to tell him as he grows up what a remarkable beginning he had and how God worked in his little life. We want you all to get to meet Holden and let us try to tell you thank you for all you have done for us. 

In other news, life moves onward for the Rapp family. On Monday night the boys got to be part of a wonderfully creative Geography Fair. Organized by Melissa Hall, each home school family in our co-op selected and researched a country to represent. The Rapp boys (spearheaded by Hunter) did a great board on Switzerland. Each family had to make or bring food from that country. We brought chocolate...but I think my boys ate more than they gave out. Oops!

Collins seems to be relishing her role as the ONLY girl in the family. Don't you think this picture is representative of the future? I'm sure her brothers will pick on her, but I also think she will be pretty spoiled!

Finally, KK leaves early Friday morning. Yikes! My first day on my own. I am a bit apprehensive simply because I know that I don't give myself much grace. I expect that the first day all alone with new baby will run as smoothly as the last day at home before baby arrived. NOT! I must remember that it will take time to transition to a new routine with six and it is OK if things don't get done right away. And though my recovery seems to be coming along, I'm not even close to being back to full strength. My mom has been so super helpful that I know we will miss her help and her presence around the house.